She could not grasp the reality of immaterial concepts. She struggled badly with the basic questions everyone else seemed to have no trouble with. Nobody knew what was wrong with her. And in cases like this, it is usually sufficient to label a child as one with a low IQ. That's what she heard about herself when she grew up. But she didn't 'know' this about herself because she could only understand the things that were 'things' or material objects.
Growing up, she offended a lot of people just by the virtue of being herself. For instance, once when her relatives were leaving and paying the usual compliments like it was great to be hosted like that , and they had a lot of fun. She had the misfortune of asking what did they mean by fun and how it could be had ? The guests were kind enough to reply sweetly that it was the feeling of wanting to laugh , and being really happy. Now happy she was familiar with. She felt different from her usual state about eating the delicious left overs. But just to be sure she asked them if this is what happy meant ? Needles to say ,her parents were not very happy about that.
See, it was no fault of hers. She could not understand what fun was. Or why a lot of people said things so differently from how they felt it. Because when the guests left , her mom was not speaking to her dad anymore for calling them over. And she knew mommy always said truths when she was in her nightie with her hair up in a bun, and not when she was in those fancy clothes she wore. She couldn't understand.
Despite all that she had a friend. And her friend was someone whom she found really silly because he asked her as many questions as she asked everyone. And that is perhaps what silly meant. They played practically , with very practical toys and always said the things they meant. And didn't meet for hours if they didn't want to , and stayed with each other for days if they wanted to. Until that one goodbye which really meant good bye and he left the place forever.
Next day when she went into the balcony where they used to play , she felt as if something was holding her heart and tugging it down into an abyss in her body which she didn't know existed. She felt in her hand , the absence , and not the presence of another hand. She didnt understand. She ran to her father because he was usually able to explain things when other people could not. And he told her. It is pain
What is pain? Is it real? She asked.
Yes it is real. He said.
How is it real ? Is it even matter ? She asked
"Pain isn't matter. But it does matter "
He wrapped her in his arms and soothed her to a sleep. Before she slept, she felt the corners of her eyes getting wet. It was water. She checked.
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